Amazed

October 1, 2008

One of the reasons I love adoption is that every adoption experience is different. Each situation is unique with different circumstances and different people.

I have felt very blessed in this experience. Today was no exception. I am going to refer to her as “A” from now on. I don’t want to share her name or a ton about her just out of respect for her. Again, if there weren’t so many people interested in adoption- I would probably not share any info about today. I love her so much and just want to honor her throughout this process.

Today was nothing short of amazing. We were so nervous and excited. It feels like we have waited for this day since August of 07. I have imagined what it would be like and I can say that it exceeded my expectations!

We got there this morning and met with our social worker for about 30 mins and then A and her social worker came into the room. We were so excited to finally see her!! We gave her flowers and hugged. She was so nervous and excited. We sat down and the conversation just started flowing. I don’t think the social workers said anything until about 30 mins into it! She asked so many questions about us and who we are. We did the same about her. We asked what her interests were and what she liked to do. We asked what her fears were and if there were any deeper questions that she wanted to ask us. There were several questions that she asked that were so convincing to us that she has an enormous love for this baby. We never doubted that but it was so fun to see it in her face. She is so beautiful and has an incredible personality!! We never stopped talking the entire time. She said over and over that she was so excited for us. That was very hard for me to hear. I wanted to encourage her and love on her and in turn she was glowing and so very excited for us. I wanted to be able to tell her that back but I can imagine that there will be sadness ahead for her. The reality was very difficult. I don’t even have words to describe that feeling.

When we began this process and throughout I have said that I will love that baby for as long as we have him. I did not feel as if I could call him my own until the 10 days were up and everything was done. Today I left with a very different feeling. I felt as if she was pleading for us to love this baby as our own from the time he comes out of her. She stated that she has thought about this decision for 9 months and she feels like she is carrying this baby for us. Did you get that? For us. This statement knocked me off my feet. I NEVER thought she would feel that way. I guess I thought she would be wavering in her decision. She sounds so sure of what she really really wants to do. I left with a sense of ownership after I saw her sweet face and listened to her ask us to be ready to parent this child because thats what she wanted. I have such a deep love and respect for her. She chose life for this baby. She LOVES this baby but this is what she wants. I just feel so humbled and honored. So I am ready. I am ready to treat this child as our own because that is what A wants. She really really wants that. If she changes her mind- we will be fine. This is just a huge way for us to honor her right now. She told us that she wants us to be excited and to not fear about her changing her mind because she isn’t going to.

So yes, we are elated. I have 2 more solid nights of sleep and then its all over!!!! I am taking time tomorrow just to get everything ready, pray and read. I am very excited. We will go Thursday and at noon will have a baby!! I really feel that God was honored today. I hope He was. We wanted her to see him and be able to share as much as we could of his love for us. We prayed with her and hugged and had a wonderful time. I will never forget today. It is just as special as the day we will see August.

We had one big thing that we learned today. The “10” days won’t be up until the 23rd. There are a couple reasons as to why but I won’t go into all that. We laughed out loud when we heard that. God is just so wanting us to be stretched and to trust Him. We just had to laugh. We will be fine.

Oh one more thing- we got a call today and there is a guy who is trying to get financing to put an offer on our house!! Does anybody see how hilarious this all is????? We are praying that he gets it and that this will be the end of our house selling strains!!

Thank you all so much for walking with us and praying. Please please pray for A as she goes in Thursday. I know she is very nervous and ready for all of this to be over. I am just praying for peace and for her to be able to sleep easy these next 2 nights. Please pray that we can share more of God with her. We love you guys and thank you for your prayers today!!!

38 hours and counting!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


i’m selling prints to raise money for our adoption

September 22, 2008

our upcoming adoption is quickly approaching…next thursday to be exact. i thought we would have the necessary funds by now, but we don’t. we’ve tried not to abuse this blog with requests to help with this adoption. God has graciously provided almost all of the money via people like yourselves. However, we are still about 1/3 short of the money needed. That comes out to be about $4,000.00. I have picked out 12 of my favorite photos in order to try and sell them to help raise the remainder of this money. These prints will be 8×10, and they will cost $35.00. This price includes shipping. If i can sell 140 prints…we’d have the rest of the money!

Thank you guys for your prayers & support throughout this entire process. We are on the home stretch, and could not be more excited. If you can’t afford a print, and still want to help us out…write a post about these prints for sell & the reason i’m selling them & link back to this post…that’d be awesome help! You guys are the best!

***you can catch up on our adoption story here***
***if you don’t want a photo, but want to donate…you can here***

please email me if you have trouble ordering this prints, or if you’d like a print large than 8×10


guess what???

August 26, 2008

You guessed it!! October 2nd there will be a precious little boy born and his mother has chosen us to parent him!!!!! It is coming very soon and we could not be more excited!!!! Our social worker called and said, “Maris this is THE call. She chose you and Steven!!” Those were the words that we have longed to hear for a year now. Today we realized that in just a few days it will mark an exact year since we began this journey to our sweet August.

We are still very aware that she can change her mind and decide to parent this precious boy and we are begging God that she would make the right decision for her and this baby. We still feel that she is the BEST and number 1 option, but if she decides to place we are there to parent this child. For today she is confident in her decision and we are going to move forward with it and be ecstatic!!!!!!!

I know that you all know the first name but for (I believe) the first time we are announcing his full name:

August Henry Bush 🙂  🙂  🙂

We love this little guy with all of our hearts already and have experienced a new joy that neither of us have ever felt before.

Please pray for her and this baby. Our mom is deeply on my heart today. Please pray that our house will sell very soon so we won’t be homeless and have a baby at the same time! Please pray that God would provide the rest of our money needed to complete this adoption.

We love all of you so much and thank you for walking this journey with us!


adoption update : we’re officially waiting!

July 15, 2008

it’s been almost a year journey for maris & i. we’ve done countless pages of paperwork, hours of working towards our fund raising, lots of photos taken & shirts sold to help raise that money, lots of generous donations, lots of prayer, lots of criticism, lots of support…all for the hope & purpose of making ourselves available to a child that needs a home. to become a mother & father for a child that needs one.

we are on the home stretch of that process. just tonight maris & i received an email saying that we’re officially approved. they will be showing our profile as much as they can, and this means we could be chosen very soon. this is super exciting news for us…we could be parents very soon.

i’ve got lots to do before then. we’re still quite a bit short on our money, and we will have to have that at the time of our placement. tomorrow will be a day filled with researching adoption loans & grants. there are some great ones out there…i’ll let you know how that goes.

thank you for your prayers & support through all of this. please continue to pray for the mother of this baby. she is making decisions that i will probably never have to make. i pray that she finds peace & comfort in making the right decision for her…whatever that might be. please pray for the health & delivery of this baby. pray for maris & i as we continue on this journey.

thanks for following our story.

blessings,
steven


August

July 12, 2008

My heart is so heavy today. My longings for this child grow stronger and stronger each day. I really feel like my heart is safely resting in the hands of God knowing that He is the only one who knows the details and timing of our lives. I feel like I am resting and trusting. I am a little perplexed as to what I do with these longings? Sometimes they are excitement, sometimes they are sadness. I find myself being a little more quiet these days! They are just really strong right now. I just feel so ready- but I know that will all change when a baby is placed in my arms! I am soooo thankful this is the route we were supposed to go first. I long to be pregnant one day but my heart could not be more excited with where we are today. I walk into our room full of baby stuff and just long for him/her to be a part of our lives. I am ready for a child that runs to me as mommy and wants me to comfort them! I am ready for a child that is dying to see and be held by daddy! I can’t wait to see Steven’s heart melt when he feels that love from this child. Its so weird because when we started this process we wanted a boy so badly! I can say that I find myself longing for a beautiful little girl too! I am absolutely ok with either and would take both of I could! 🙂

The weeks are so weird now. I love Mondays! I know they are in the office and working. Its the beginning of the week and who knows what the week will hold? I just want my phone to ring! Friday’s are a little harder 😦 All in all we are doing great and getting more and more excited. This is just the strangest process with the craziest emotions! Please keep praying for our mom who is making tough decisions, for the rest of our money that we need and for our house to sell! I have been overwhelmed with all of you who have been reading this blog. I am so sorry that we don’t post more! Your comments have been so sweet and we are rejoicing and understanding all the hurts and struggles with each of you who are in the adoption process too. We are praying for you too! Thank you for reading.

Maris

I got my diaper bag in the mail today and cannot wait to use it!


Well…. we are waiting!

July 2, 2008

I talked to our social worker yesterday and she told me that she is going to start showing our profile! I think life has been a little crazy at their office. They seem really busy right now but she assured me that our profile would be shown. We are super excited and feel like it could be anyday.

This journey has been beautiful for Steven and I. We talked last night and Steven sounded so confident and ready to be a dad! I feel like my love grew for him in a different way last night. I don’t know if you have read on either of our personal blogs but we are in the midst of moving to Texas right now. Our house is up for sale, we have boxes in the garage and hopefully we will have this baby before we leave. EVERYTHING is such a huge question in our lives right now. Will this baby be a boy or a girl? Will our house sell? When do we leave? So many questions. I know this is where we are supposed to be right now. We have both taken our turns during this journey of wanting this so bad, then freaking out for a while, scared about all of the details and back to knowing that God is in total control. I too am ready. Whether it be boy or girl we are ready for August in our lives!

I cannot stop thinking about our mom here lately. I know that she is probably going through some heartache and decisions right now. I pray, as told her in her letter that we wrote to her, that she makes the right choice for her. That this is her baby and her decision. She is in my thoughts and prayers so much. My love for her and wanting to be a part of her life is so strong right now. I want so badly for her to feel God’s love during this time. I am praying so much for her. I love her the way that I already love this baby. I just want so badly to meet her. Please pray for these women today. They are making huge life decisions. They are strong and have immense love for their kids. I pray for no regrets in her life. I pray for a confident decision for her and this baby. I want her to parent first and if that is not the decision that she makes we want to be there to help her and love her and this baby.

This is a crazy process with weird emotions! I am so thankful for all of you who have been reading and keeping up with everything. We are more excited than you could ever know! Now its our time just to wait for the right mom to choose us.


Well…. we are done!

June 7, 2008

After many months (many is relative)  we have everything that our adoption agency needs from us turned in!!! Our social worker came to our house and did our last bit and now everything is in her hands. She said it would take her about a month to get our homestudy done. We should be hearing from her around the first of July to start the “official” waiting process!! We are soooooooooo excited and ready for this baby! I can’t believe everything is done and it is officially out of our hands. It feels like we crossed over the top of a huge mountain and we can see the promise land!!

It is great to have this month to sit back and relax and enjoy our time together. These could be the last couple of months we have by ourselves for a long time. I feel really good right now. Not to anxious or impatient. I am really relaxed and dreaming about this baby. Who knows if it will be a boy or a girl? We were really hoping it would be a boy in the beginning (and still) but I think we are getting a little more excited about the idea of a girl. Who knows!

I have our baby bed, mattress, stroller/car seat, pack n play, bouncer and some other really great gifts! I LOVE all of them! I love looking at them and can’t wait to put a baby in each of them! We love all of you for the support, love, gifts and prayers you have given to us. This is really becoming a reality and we can’t wait to share this journey with you all. My heart is in love with adoption. I am in love with becoming a mom!!